10 Things You’d Never Catch a Native Doing or Saying

Vincent Schilling

10 Things You’d Never Catch a Native Doing or Saying

Here at ICTM, we have written several articles of late that have served as indicators of just what makes someone a Native American. It could be funny things or not so funny things depending on the person who is reading the indicator.

But what about those things that you’d never catch a Native doing? We thought we’d ask on social media and once again, the truth reared its head in a funny but telling way.

So in this light, here are 10 Things You’d Never Catch a Native Doing or Saying:

Claiming Cherokee Royal Ancestry

Jayson Brave Hearrt wins the number one spot of the You’d Never Catch a Native list. But we have this to say Jayson, what if someone’s great grandmother really was a Cherokee Princess? What then? This No. 1 list item would be invalid wouldn’t it?

Twerking at a Round Dance

Look out Miley Cyrus wannabe’s, the twerking gig is up! Thanks to Joseph Thomas, We are now a bit worried about those twerking videos that now might start to surface in Indian country to the beat of our favorite round dance tunes. Or Miley Cyrus music – wait – those are already out there.

Saying “Columbus Did Discover America”

Yes, this is certainly true Mr. Columbus, you will never get that nod from Native people that you discovered anything at all. Especially since people were here already. Oh and as a matter of fact you landed in the Bahamas. Thanks to Karen Cooper ( and a ton of other folks on Facebook.)

Happily Dressed as a Pilgrim on Thanksgiving

Considering some folks said never dressed as a Pilgrim with quick retorts of disappointed parents, we thought we would merge the two with the following statement. There have been some disappointed Indians dressed as Pilgrims out there folks.

Yelling ‘Geronimo!’ When Jumping Out of a Plane

Kudos to Steven Greene from Barker, New York for this brilliant quip. But we do have a question for you Steven, what are Native people supposed to yell?

Calling Themselves a Redskin

Shannon Marie found a great way to promote a truth and a valiant agenda in the same statement. In her Facebook post Shannon wrote about the importance of not referring to herself as Redskin to which the post received likes of support.

Arriving Early to a Pow wow

Guilty. Do we really need a description here? Indian time…you know the deal. Thanks to Lynn VanderMolen Metzger from Ohio.

Paying for a Hunting and Fishing License

Ok truth be told, we are not too sure of the exact appropriateness of this post, but considering the laughter value, it is certainly worth being posted. Make sure to thank Lawrence Campbell on Facebook for this one, just don’t check his licenses.

Saying, ‘I Don’t Have Very Many Cousins’

Ann Shuski helped bring in the last of our Never Catch a Native quips, to which we find great appreciation. Because – yes, we all have about 6,000 cousins.